Love People, Trust God

There is a lot hanging on this statement.

I am just now beginning to understand the meaning behind this. The more I know and understand, the more peaceful my day to day life becomes. I hold this to be extremely true now that I have begun to understand that Loving People and Trusting God is really an asset to my sobriety.

First. Before I found a higher power of my understanding (whom I choose to call God) I put a lot of human qualities on God...Disappointment, Abandonment, Judgment...just to name a few. How could I trust the God that turned against me; made me this awful mess of an alcoholic...

Second. When I first got sober I didn't even know what love was. I associated love with sex only. I didn't understand how to LOVE a person without sex (and there where many many people that I did not wish to have sex with.) PLUS, those people that I shared sex with, just broke my heart. Love was stupid and sick as far as my mind thought.

So, here is what sobriety has taught me.

I had it all backwards.

People DO and WILL disappoint us. People will hurt us and make us cry and our heart will ache for them. Why? because were human, NOT God. We make mistakes and say the wrong things and we judge. We are just flesh and bone running around with self will in a world full of war and labels and insecurities. We are all under pressure to live up to unreachable standards (especially if you have an alcoholic mind!). But we are also gentle and kind and beautifully unique in so many ways. We are hard but when we let down our guards, we are soft, and calm and quiet. I believe at the base of every human soul lies the unstoppable urge to be loved by anyone! To feel important and beautiful for who we are...That's why today, in sobriety I choose to see past our outer shells and LOVE people - sometimes we can't help the way we are, but I truly believe each one of us deserves somebody who loves them.

God NEVER turns His back on us. OOOOOOh this is a very tricky concept for those who are just finding their "higher Power". Well, here is my testimony, and if you stay sober, you will know exactly what I mean. If you don't believe it yet, just stick around until that miracle happens (we have all herd that saying in AA rooms). I know without a doubt that I had God all wrong. He never turned His back on me, he was just waiting for me to tap into faith (what kind of credibility does an all powerful God have that reacts to your every demand without wanting anything in return? That sounds more like human characteristics to me). So I asked God to be with me and I meant it and he gave me this new life. I have been sober almost a year and trust me, its an act of God. All I had to do was trust God, and now I know everything will be alright. Sounds too good to be true? Don't knock it until you try it. And I mean REALLY REALLY try it. None of that half-ass shit that us alcoholics like to pull. NO whining. Give it your all like its the last shot at a good existence you will ever have....and you can have it all.

So yes, LOVE people and TRUST God.
When I apply this, my heart stays just where it feels the best.
And that empty void? Gone.




I watched a movie (Ive herd the book is better!)that really spoke to me, and could have been quite possible the turn around I needed to look at God in a different light.
*Go rent "Conversations With God" or read the book. It was a breaking point for me against old thought patterns, it could very well help you too.